There's been some amusing twisted phrases out of Rancho Clumsy this week:
Talking about a new acquaintance, I referred to not knowing this bloke "from a bar of Adam".
And Greg surprised himself while discussing how his success at study will require a good deal of personal responsibilty, saying "The University's not going to organise my balls".
He meant to say "the ball's in my court", but the tennis analogy got lost somewhere along the way (Don't even ask why Greg has balls on the brain).
Seriously, with this kind of literary awkwardness, we could write a Kath and Kim episode.
Anybody else got some sterling examples of clumsy speech?
"It is not rocket surgery" is one of my personal faves, but I can't claim that I really got the phrases mixed... I do tend to say things like "It's better than a poke in the eye with a wet fish" and "Better than a slap in the face with a burnt stick" - which most things are!
ReplyDeleteWhilst not a turned phrase, this quote is topical...
ReplyDeleteHanging is too good for a woman who makes puns; she should be drawn and quoted.
One of my favourites from Al Gore
ReplyDelete"A zebra cannot change its spots."
Hey Rastas,
ReplyDeleteI love puns. I love Dorothy Parker puns. Everything that came out of that woman's mouth was gold.
One of my favourites is her review of a performance of Jean-Paul Satre's play "In Camera". She simply said: Me No Leica.
Genius!
Thanks for commenting guys ;)
Wait, I've got another one.
ReplyDeleteThis morning, while doing a story about Anna Nicole Smith's funeral, I described how she had been laid to rest in the Bananas.
I meant to say Bahamas.
However, I am tired, for reasons that shall become abundently clear when next I blog...
I do tend to say: "That's how the cookie bounces.." (cookie crumbles vs ball bounces... or whatever...)
ReplyDeleteI thought of you when I mixed metaphors this morning...
ReplyDelete"Don't count your chickens until the sheep come home to roost".
The person I was speaking to, looked at me dumbly. It seems I was entirely clear on my intent, so no questions asked.
After saying that, and realising that I had stuffed it up completely, it was challenge to keep a straight face and look him straight in the eye and continue!
Hey guys!
ReplyDeleteThey're hilarious examples. I reckon I should write one of those little books you buy for $4.95 at newsagents. Just containing a whole bunch of mixed metaphors and ballsed-up phrases. They do it for misheard song lyrics, after all!
Nat.