The last competition I ran - while a technical fiasco - did seem to be reasonably popular. So let's have another go.
Post a comment, and include a joke, or a funny story or quote, or a link to a humourous picture video. Whichever tickles my funnybone most, wins a post from me about them, or the topic of their choice.
I fell down the stairs on Saturday night, while walking my valentine date (who is a professional stripper) out of a party. Certainly bruised my pride as well as my elbows.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSpJphWkRfY - a part of B.J. Novak's stand-up routine, called "Wikipedia Brown".
ReplyDeleteI know how you feel. I'm very much the same way most of the time.
ReplyDeleteWhenever I'm "meh" I look at this picture :
http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2007/04/lolsloth.jpg
It helps.
I made jam. It was good.
ReplyDeleteThe most I've ever laughed at something on the internet was this security footage of a drunk man breaking into a liqour store.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M3VMHxWRjRc
I think that makes me a bad person.
I feel kind of bad about this, I'm sure I should be coming up with something of my own, but I'm tired. Ergo, my favourite Penny Arcade:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2004/12/03/
Nat
ReplyDeleteI think this is funny..I found this on the web...it's every swear word ever said on the sopranos in every episode ever :-
http://vimeo.com/2998698
Sure it was years ago now, but I did a backstage interprative dance version of Blackrock...
ReplyDeleteand I like ham sandwiches..
Wait! I've got a new one. A perfect video for you. A shakespeare one. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HbVylFKfisU&eurl=http://britanick.com/videos.php
ReplyDeleteFurthermore, there is nothing more funny that human stupidity :
ReplyDeletehttp://failblog.org/
I once, when working in the exciting field of discount variety (Crazy Prices! Woot) in my teenage years, asked a woman with no arms past her elbows 'can I give you a hand?'. Really and truly. I wanted to die.
ReplyDeleteAlso during the surly teenage Saturday job years, a lady came in asking if we had any Christmas themed lolly bags for kid's parties. Grumpy pimply hormonal 17 year old me thought I was being clever by telling her she could just write 'Jesus' under the 'Happy Birthday' ones. Apparently, they were for a church group. She had words with the manager.
(I am no good at the interwebs. But the above post and this post are from Amy. Aka me.)
ReplyDeleteOkay many moons ago...
ReplyDeleteTwas summer in London, and it being a Saturday I was walking to Covent Garden from Charing Cross station to meet friends for drink and maybe some food.
I did not notice the large rubbish receptical hiding in my path. The next thing i know the bin jumps me and I'm in the bin down past my shoulders. Happily my quick reflexes saved me and I managed to wriggle clear much to the appreciation of passers by who were clearly amazed at how i had managed to defend myself.
Okay okay I was distracted by a good looking woman walkign in front of me, didn't see the bin and ended up head first in the bloody thing.
My faourite joke:
ReplyDeleteWhat's brown and sticky?
.
.
.
A stick!
This keeps me amused http://frogofgreen.blogspot.com .
I nominate Soapbox Opera, so if that's the funniest do I win or does Mick (seeing he is doing all the work).
ReplyDeleteBangar making simple things complicated and complicated things simple.
Here is an 'honestly, you can be proud of your coordination, and also, you will live longer than i will' incident:
ReplyDelete2006: Ironing in the early morning
You know life's unwritten instructions? Like, "Do not attempt to eat this giraffe?"
I'm fairly sure there's one that states, "While using a steam iron, be sure to wear pants."
It is 6:45 am and I have groin burns.
After the running water (And yes I did try to sit in the sink), I sent a text message to my best mate.
Richard responded to my anguished cry with:
"It is with great trepidation I say that I always thought you had a hot pussy."
---
An thing from work, 2007:
Incident while committing art with a small boy early last week:
Lad: "C'n I have some o' them fings?"
"The toothpicks?"
Lad: "Yeh, c'n i have some to take home?"
"Only if they're part of your artwork."
* Lad sits still for a few moments, then starts inserting toothpicks into the centre of his crepe-and-drinking-straw roses.
"What are they for?"
Lad: (thoughtfully inserts 8 more.) "Bees..."
----
lovely links that I go to for happies:
Kate Beaton's comics, like this and this one
Erika Moen's comics, like this one.
PS I AM BRINGING THREE GLOWING RODS TONIGHt. THREE. COUNT THEM.
Hope you feel better soon. Em.
Earlier this year I decided that I wanted to name my own star. The front-runner is ‘Oisin’s Ego’. I can’t wait to hear the captain’s announcement for when they’re approaching that thing.
ReplyDeleteI pooped a hammer!
ReplyDeleteHey everyone,
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for all your stories and links. I have laughed and smiled a lot.
But the winner is...
A tie!
Yes, I couldn't decide between:
*Amy's story about telling a customer they could write "For Jesus" on their Happy Birthday cards and that would make do for Xmas cards... and...
*Em's link to a historical AND hysterical comic involving Ben Franklin (with the most wonderful manic look on his face). I loves me some history gags:
http://beatonna.livejournal.com/70912.html
So there you go. Amy and Em, a post on a topic of your choice. I might write them up together, or separately, depending on what you ask for...
And thanks again to everyone else - what lovely blogging buddies you all are!
Mistrial!
ReplyDeleteHooray! Em and I will have to do a victory dance with cleaning products. But what to request? Decisions, decisions...
ReplyDeleteAmy (who does not have anything she wishes to link too and therefore cannot display her name properly)
on the topic of Penny Arcade, my favourite saga:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.penny-arcade.com/archive/?comic-keywords=fruit+fucker
Hooray x 2! I'm so delighted to have made a convert! Read the Byron one yet?
ReplyDeleteI would like to hear your funniest/grossest flatmate story. Doesn't have to be from personal experience.
Amy: BRILLIANT anecdote :}
ReplyDeleteThis made me laugh til I cried, though be warned, it's extremely explicit and not suitable for work!!!
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1SIcFYGwz4