Jan 15, 2010

Jingo

I walked out to grab my cab this morning and the receptionist said "Good luck!". I thought for a moment she was wishing me well in my journalistic duties; until I saw my driver was a Sikh. I think perhaps she was indulging in some casual racism about Indian taxi drivers. Because, you know, THEY CAN'T DRIVE PROPERLY AND STUFF.

By the time I got back to the office, I'd had THREE Indian taxi drivers. All three knew their way around town perfectly. All three were polite and quiet. I attempted to give one of them a direction. He pointed out a better route.  I attempted to point out a shortcut to another. He already knew it.

Can all those Facebook groups about "No more Indian cab drivers!" be shut down now please? I know it's just my experience, but they're making me uncomfortable.

Meanwhile the Queensland Police Union has called for heavier penalties for louts who have a skinful on Australia Day, drape themselves in Australian flags, then go around causing trouble. Jingoism draped long and flowing, to hide the racism. Billy Hughes and PigIron Bob Menzies are dancing a merry jig in hell.

The authorities call for EVERYONE to "respect the flag".

The flag is the flag! We must respect what it means!

In that case, can we stop importing thirty cent Chinese plastic knock-offs to attach to the driver and passenger side windows of our Falcons and Commodores?

'Cause when I think of all those ANZACs who lost their guts in a hail of Turkish gunfire on some grizzly dawn, I doubt they thought they were fighting for the right of some bogan Normanby punters to flutter strips of blue plastic from their vehicles as they slag off Indian cab drivers for TAKING THEIR JOBS.

I mean, the Model T Ford had barely even been invented.

Now it's a free society. I know you have the right to your cheap-ass bogan car decals. GO RIGHT AHEAD.

But then you can't judge me if I consider a well-made flag, constructed of some sort of FABRIC, and flown from a FLAGPOLE, as being slightly more worthy than your Crazy Clark's half-assed attempt at patriotism.

And, truth be told, you can't judge me if I decide I don't actually care one way or another about your version of "respecting the flag".

Last year a massive flag measuring 10 metres across was stolen from outside a business on Brisbane's southside.

Un-Australian! they bayed.

Un-Australian? UN-AUSTRALIAN?!?!?

"Modern" Australia, the one with us whiteys in it, was founded by a bunch of crooks and thieves, transported for life for nicking a slice of bread Blighty-side.

Stealing a gigantic Australian flag on Australia Day is possible THE most Australian thing you could do.

That's something I can respect.

10 comments:

  1. *STANDING OVULATION*

    All the best for tonight too. Sadly can't make it. Sis inlaw and her ferals are here. Groan.

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  2. Good post GC. Beautifully articulated.

    I've never been able to figure out the difference between jingoism and racism. (Nor for that matter, the difference between jingoism and patriotism)

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  3. The most un-Australian thing in Australia is the term 'un-Australian'. It's become a hold-all descriptor for bigots and fuckwits to use whenever they see something which doesn't adhere to their piss-narrow white-bread view of the world.

    People with Southern Cross tattoos across their backs who wear the flag as a cape at the BDO and demand people kiss it or they'll thump 'em. Those sorts of people should be in a sinking dinghy off Christmas Island, with the RAN on the horizon. Bearing AWAY.

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  4. Hell yeah!

    The pizza call centre I work at has a lot of Indian students working there. They have to put up with all sorts of crap from callers. Recently I took a complaint from a woman whose first words were "Thank God I've got someone who speaks English as a first language". I let that one go but she kept making these comments so eventually I told her I'd terminate the call if she didn't stop with the racist remarks. And when I looked into the mistake that had been made with her pizza, the Indian order-taker had got everything right, it was the store who had stuffed up. Ignorant bigot.

    Since I deal with about five or six different generic regional accents on a daily basis at work for a lousy $15 an hour (Australian, East Asian, South Asian, Middle Eastern, Eastern European and Irish, for a start), people who whine about not being able to understand people with foreign accents have my contempt. And from long call centre experience, someone with a heavy accent but who is smart is a *lot* easier to deal with than someone with an Australian accent who is stupid, or who doesn't realise that to be understood you have to open. Your. Damn. Mouth. And. Enunciate. Your. Damn. Words!!

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  5. OoooH!!!!!

    If the RSL read this You'm gonna be in big doo doo memsahib
    Regards
    The Ancient Man
    Samuel Johson said it best

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  6. Too bad it's a minority of f*ckwits who ruin what is otherwise a nice day of drinking and listening to the Triple J hottest 100 countdown.

    I notice I'm now getting weird looks when I wear my "australia" tshirt, as if people expect me to bash them. It cost me $4 (why I got it in the first place) and I don't even notice what shirt I put on.

    So go f*ck yourself you racist dicks. You cost me what could have been a very cheap clothing option!

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  7. This is perhaps, one of the most offensive posts that I have read.

    This quote, "Can all those Facebook groups about "No more Indian cab drivers!" be shut down now please?" is absolutely abhorrent. Of course you should be able to censor them!

    This helps "truth be told, you can't judge me" but, great to know that you can judge bogans.

    You seem a real asset to civic life.

    Kind regards,


    L

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  8. Hey there Lerm,

    You may be right about me bagging bogans. It's probably not a good thing.

    If it helps, I'll point out that I see "bogan" as a state of mind, rather than any kind of reflection of socio-economic status. In fact, the kind of people I'm bitching about are generally people with a bit of money.

    As for the Facebook groups - well. You start a group with a clearly discernable racist message - either overtly or subvertly - I really think you should be shut down. That shit is harmful. Maybe not to the well-informed onlooker. But over time, shit builds up.

    I've never pretended to be an "asset for civic life". I've just tried not to be a detriment to it.

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  9. GC what can I say the Leech had an Australian flag tattoo, as well as a spray painted message "I grew here you flew here" and a Dutch surname.

    MIQFB, Minium IQ For Breathing would improve the place.

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  10. Until I read this entry I thought "Australia Day" was sort of a fake holiday Australians told seppos about to make them look stupid. Imagine my sudden chagrin resulting from now learning the truth.

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