For example - sitting on a chair just not comfortable enough?
Plop your hoofs onto the Feet Seat:
Eating on your lap creating too much kinetic tension between your food and your pants?
Whack your plate on a Stable Table:
At the end of the day, they were selling us ottomans and trays, products that have probably been around since the Stone Age. One can imagine a cave man sitting on one rock and putting his feet up on another; while his recently-gored-by-a-mammoth mate watched ochre paintings while scoffing berries from a piece of slate.
Like my Dad thousands of years later, the cave men would probably even giggle whenever somebody said "Where's the pouffe?"
But throw a silly catcy name on it, and watch the cash roll in. The only difference with these new-wave ottomans and trays was that both were full of beans. Bean bag beans. The kind of beans that once spilled, could never be recollected. For years after a refilling mishap, one would find tiny white beans under couches, in the corner of living rooms, wedged between carpet fibres.
Ultimately, I think it was the beans that led to the rhyming household products' demise. They were just too easily eaten by small children, pets, and people mistaking them for floor Tic-Tacs.
But I sometimes miss the days when you couldn't walk into Kmart without ploughing headfirst into giant pyramids of Feet Seats and Stable Tables. Somebody should bring back modern versions - sit on a "Flair Chair", have your baby on a "Pushin' Cushion", or whip up a truly electric stirfry in a "Shock Wok".
I should get paid for this kind of brainstorming, I really should.
"have your baby on a "Pushin' Cushion"ReplyDelete
I don't think the image I have in mind is what the manufacturers & marketers meant.
Urban Dictionary agrees with the 12yo in me.
It unfortunately doesn't have a rhyming name, but the other product that comes to mind from this period is the Ezykneel Garden Kneeler http://www.hardwaresuperstore.com.au/shop/products/EZYKNEEL-STANDARD-ADDIS-1990100.htmlReplyDelete
Seems we just couldn't get enough cushioning in the 80s.
No beans, sadly, but surely the Queen of the Obvious and the Empress of the Unnecessary was the K-Tel Record Selector.ReplyDelete
Heath - cushioning is key to so many things, I think, possibly up to and including world peace.ReplyDelete
Anonymous - I have heard that name "K-Tel Record Selector" so many times, but I've never seen one in the flesh, or, electronics. Doubt I ever will now!